Taking on Tiger: 'Sexual Healing' on South Park

South Park kicked off its fourteenth season last night with a show, called "Sexual Healing" about Tiger Woods and the "outbreak" of sex addiction in the United States.

SUMMARY (watch online here, scroll down for analysis)

The episode started out with what looked like the night when Elin Nordegren found out about Woods' affairs. Elin chases him around the house with a golf club until Tiger tries to escape in his Escalade. It's then that the camera zooms out and we see Cartman and Kenny playing the whole scene out in a video game, which turns out to be EA Sports' Tiger Woods '11, which all the boys agree is way cooler than any other golf game. After each commercial break, South Park creators Matt Stone and Trey Parker turn the same trick, with Woods attempting to hit a golf shot before Elin shows up and they fight Mortal Kombat-style, and later Woods is giving his televised apology when once again Elin battles him. Besides being able to do sweet combos with the golf club, you can "press x to lie" and use the "pre-nuptial power up." At the end, the game eventually turns to golf without the fighting, which the boys find incredibly lame.

In between these vignettes, Stone and Parker levy a direct attack on the concept of sex addiction, which they clearly believe to be either a ridiculous excuse for the natural desire of men to sleep with as many women as possible, or something that all men "suffer" from, but is only manifest in rich and famous men because they have the ability to easily consummate those desires. The main plot starts with a meeting of the U.S. Center for Disease Control, which is worried about the series of recent rich and famous men who, for some inexplicable reason, like to have sex with many women who are not their wife. Refusing to acknowledge that they also have the same urges, the men decide that the mysterious sex addiction disease must be the cause. Their first action is to make sure it has not infected the children.

The CDC tests school children for sex addiction by showing them a picture of a naked woman and then asking "What color was the handkerchief the nice lady was holding?" Any student that answers "What handkerchief?" is deemed to be a sex addict. Kenny, Kyle and Butters, along with 90 percent of high school boys, are diagnosed with sex addiction, which the CDC rep warns will surely end in a David Carradine-style auto-erotic asphyxiation death. Later, Kenny of course tries it out and dies, confirming Kyle and Butters' fears that they will meet the same fate.

Kyle and Butters are sent to sex addiction therapy, where Woods, David Letterman, Bill Clinton, David Duchovny and others are already being "treated." After a few predictable sex jokes, the therapist finally identifies the ultimate problem all the men had: getting caught. To avoid being labeled sex addicts, the men had to simply not get caught. Kyle speaks up and says that they should instead be responsible for their actions, which causes the therapist to radio "we've got a turd in the pool."

Meanwhile, the CDC conducts another study with monkeys. They give an otherwise normal monkey a bag full of cash, and unbelievably the monkey has sex with every other monkey in the cage until he is finally caught by his wife who beats him, and then the rest of the monkeys throw dirt and feces at him, "isolating" him from the group.

The CDC brings the results of their study to President Obama, who proposes that the Roswell aliens had spread the disease across America, all while casting nervous glances at Michelle Obama, who is also present. Since the CDC believes money has something to do with sex addiction, they look at $100 bills. Independence Hall is pictured on the back, so they all decide that the Roswell alien is hiding there.

Obama, along with machine-gun toting soldiers, invade Independence Hall. One scientist says that the alien may have cast a spell on American men to make them sex addicts, prompting Obama to say they must be dealing with a crazy alien wizard. Finally, one soldier laughs and says the obvious, that there was no alien wizard or sex addiction, and that everyone should finally admit that all men have the desire to sleep with many women, and that most women with fame and money would probably take advantage of it. The soldier is subdued by everyone else, who continue to search for the alien wizard.

Because Stan seems to have the ability to resist his sex addiction, the soldiers decide the spell has no power over him, so they give him and Butters guns to kill the alien. Again unbelievably an uncoordinated "alien" wearing a Disney wizards hat suddenly comes staggering out. Stan and Butters eventually kill it.

The episode concludes with President Obama announcing that the sex addiction alien wizard had been defeated, and assuring the American people that the next time a rich and famous man had an affair, the reason would be that we was under the spell of another alien wizard. At least now they knew why. As for Tiger, he announces his relief at the press conference that he has recovered from the sex addiction, and happily announces how grateful he is that Elin will not get revenge by sleeping with a bunch of men. She looks sideways at him with shifty eyes.

ANALYSIS

Before getting to the rest of the show, I'd like to talk about the video game scenes. First, a video game is a fantasy world under the complete control of the player. This is exactly how a chronic adulterer like Woods feels - as he said himself, he felt entitled. The key is that Woods was not actually in control and more importantly there are real consequences for his actions. Also, by giving Elin real power to injure Woods in the video game, her real powerlessness to defend herself against Woods' transgressions is highlighted. The other side of the video game metaphor is the way Woods' scandal provides entertainment for the public. Stan and Cartman only care about "golf" now that there is exciting drama surrounding its most famous player. Once Woods goes back to playing, no one will care anymore. Finally, the video game relates back to the rest of the plot, because when you play a video game, you live out a life that you otherwise can't. This is one of Stone and Parker's main points - that most men would act just as irresponsibly as Tiger if they had as much money as him, but ridiculing him gives them a chance to divert attention from their own shameful thoughts and desires.

The rest of the episode exaggerates the way men lie about their own deviant sexual desires. Instead of admitting that most men want to sleep with as many women as possible, doctors invent a mysterious "addiction." Stone and Parker's response is that of course men suffer from "sex addiction." It's evolutionary and elementary. Men want to spread their seed, if you will, and the rich and famous simply have more opportunities. Like the doctors, President Obama would rather revert to the pathetic recycled Roswell alien case than admit his own sinful thoughts. Even worse, any man who does admit that the whole thing is a charade is attacked.

I think Stone and Parker want men who claim sex addiction to instead take responsibility for their actions and admit that, yes, they wanted to have sex with all these women, it wasn't a mistake, though now that they have been caught, they do have some regrets (namely, getting caught). Stone and Parker probably are saying that sex addiction is a joke of an excuse, but an excuse that all men want to support so that they will be protected from their own transgressive thoughts or actions. People will go so far to accuse 4th graders of sex addiction or make up a doddering alien wizard. Every man is "shocked" that another man would want to have sex with someone who wasn't his wife, yet their sideways glances tell the whole story. Women are pretty much powerless to fight back against their unfaithful men, unlike in the video game, though they do have one option - having transgressive thoughts or actions themselves, as highlighted by Elin's glance at Tiger during the press conference.